I am seriously hoping that there is a silver lining behind the clouds that seem to be hovering over me.
My creative energy has been sapped - well at least for now.
Clarissa Pinkola Estes, a well known psychologist who has written many self-help books, states that when one is having difficulties in their life, that is not the time to work on the hard stuff, but rather the time to sit quietly and wait until you feel healthy and ready to step out again.
So, this is where I am - sitting inside of myself, hoping that the chaos and turmoil that surround me because I am unable to continue doing what I have always done finds a resolution on its own. While others around me try to change my stance, I am the only one who knows what my limits are, physical as well as emotional.
I am not always as healthy as I would like; I am not always as giving as I would like to be; I am not always able to say "yes" to all who need something. Still, I give as much as I can and try to see the beauty within all who pull at my heartstrings.
Life changes. Priorities change. Hopefully people will change as well - to grow, to learn, to understand that what once was, is no longer a viable option. Responsibility lies within each and every one of us to be our own advocates, our own friend, our own master.
So as the day continues to grow cloudier and darker and the storm front gets closer with loud thunderous booms and the lightening strikes with an angry force that cannot be denied, I will hug my children, my grandchildren, my husband, and my puppy with strong arms, a true heart, and the conviction to move my life forward in hopes that when the storm is over, I will be on the other side of a rainbow that proves how true my colors were to those who were not only truthful, but also true to me.
Listen - the rain is not far behind.......
Hoping that tomorrow is a brighter more beautiful day for all of you!
It will be for me as I am the maker of own life.
Laura Anne and Bella Boo, the most wonderfully warm puppy on this planet
Monday, April 22, 2013
With all the babysitting duties that I have been doing this year, my creative time seemed to be getting lost in the abyss of diaper changes, formula to be made, bottles to fill, babies to rock and hugs to be handed out. Don't get me wrong, there is no way that I would ever change my "grandma" duties as the "three amigos" are the apples of my eye, but being an artist, there is still the need to create and in mid-March, when the skies are grey and the north winds blow so that you feel like the winter is never going to end, one needs something else to do in Chicago besides sit inside and look out at the dreariness that seemingly surrounds you.
Fortunately for me, the local newspaper served up the just right challenge to get this old grandma's creative juices flowing again - An art contest at a local art gallery!
6" x 6" canvases would be handed out to the first 80 artists who showed up on a chosen day. The theme was "Botany Magnified" and the painting, photo, etc. was to be handed in within 6 weeks. A week later, there would be a formal showing of all 80 canvases and 3 winners would be chosen. So...I got started...two weeks before it was due...not unusual for me...I love to procrastinate and feel the heat...well, at least that is what I tell myself.
I didn't win but I had a lot of fun thinking about it, creating it, and dreaming it up. A few of my fellow artists whom I truly enjoy and think highly of, praised my piece which meant more to me than a blue ribbon. I value their critiques more than those of the judges who were interior designers because my artist friends truly know what goes into the creative thought process and the actual execution of any piece of artwork. My husband, children and grandchildren attended the event as well and it was fun to have them all there with me cheering me on. They made the night even more special.
I hope to participate in the contest again next year. Maybe I'll start working on my canvas as soon as I get it...probably not though...the challenge of time management seems to be the drive in my creative journey.
So for today, I will meander down roads untouched with my paintbrushes and my stamps and tomorrow, if need be, I will put the petal to the metal when and if another deadline approaches.
Hoping you all find a contest or two to keep you going on your creative journey.
Laura Anne and Bella Boo
Posted by Laura Anne at 1:11 AM